Everyone gets to a point in life where nothing seems to work. It feels as though the world is against you. It could be a result of a failed relationship, financial struggle, seemingly embarrassing physique, a pattern of academic failure, or anything. At that point, you are tempted to doubt everything you have ever believed in.
wake up one morning to realize that the very hopeful and cheerful person you used to be is gone. You’d feel so lonely and withdrawn. You will not want to be seen or heard. You will perceive everyone to have a thing or two to say negatively about you. It would help if you toned it down. You are a unique person who has allowed people and things to decide how you feel. It’s time to turn that around. Boss up, man! Stand up!
You didn’t get to this point in a day. Getting out of it wouldn’t also be in a day. You will need to take conscious and deliberate actions to be at the top. You will be intentional about how, where, and to whom you move. We bring you this piece specifically to help you harness your inner strength and shine like a diamond as you should wherever you step going forward. You’re about to be confident again. Cheer up, will you?
There’s a popular belief among humans that we attract what we say and become what we think. Make positive declarations negating the root cause of your confidence crisis. For example, someone who struggles to accept his physique will do a lot of good by consciously saying: “I am unique and handsome.” You know where your shoe pinches: make positive declarations to help you see yourself in a new light.
“I’ve got this” – as simple as it sounds, has helped me personally when I come face-to-face with situations that threaten to put me under. It awakens my capacity to deal with difficulties. I always end up wowing myself (and people around). If needs be, write out words that inspire you. Glue them to places you frequent to remind you of your capabilities.
Surround Yourself With People That Support You
Not everyone will like you: the earlier you accept that fact, the faster you will become a confident person in his skin. Cristiano Ronaldo is the most followed celebrity on Instagram with over 412 million followers; he still gets abused in the most vicious ways. Kim Kardashian is no different – famous yet trolled.
There are people that like you and believe in your dreams. Allow these people into your life. But, be intentional about who you bring into your private space. Anything and anyone that tears down should be far from you. Does that mean you wouldn’t hear the wrong words? No! But, it’d make the wrong words have a lesser effect on you as days go by since you’d always be in companies where you are loved and supported.
Dress In A Way That Feels Good To You
You will agree that you tend to be more confident when you are nicely dressed. I remember my days in the university – there were Sundays I would walk around the whole church after service to show off my outfit. No matter what anybody has against me, his opinion doesn’t matter at that time. I was just all out to shine and savor the feel of it.
Dress well. Elegantly, if (and when) you can. Walkthrough corners you used to avoid because you feel inadequate in yourself – this time, stylishly dressed with a carriage of grace. It will amaze you the effect it’d have on your overall confidence.
Don’t Always Be In A Rush To Air Your Thoughts
Everyone always has an opinion on everything. No matter what you see or hear, you’d unconsciously form an opinion. That you have an opinion, even if it’s the right one, doesn’t mean you should always be in a rush to air it for validation. Learn to hold back: it makes you unpredictable. Unpredictability with grace is attractive.
Robert Greene posited “always say less than necessary” as a Law of Power in his book, 48 Laws of Power. He buttressed his point by revealing you create the appearance of meaning and power by saying less than is necessary.
People have too much to say most of the time, even if it doesn’t make sense. When you hold back with words, people are wired to think you know more but will rather not engage for vain validation. Their eventual disposition will boost your confidence in your abilities.
Work On Your Strengths
There’s something unique about you. Whatever that is, invest time and energy in it. Become so good at it that people are compelled to come to you, regardless of whatever shortcoming you used to think you had. People don’t ignore outstanding individuals – push yourself to be outstanding at what you do.
Stevie Wonder lost his sight shortly after birth. He had a “reasonable” reason to be a waste. Nevertheless, he braced himself against all odds and has been able to give us good music. Sight or not, people feel blessed by just being around him. If his disability didn’t translate into inability because he learned to define himself rightly, you could shine also.
Take your mind away from what isn’t working right. Focus on what you know how to do. What you know how to do is the solution to someone’s problem. People don’t ignore whoever proffers solutions to their problems. Be valuable. You’ll find out you have no issues with confidence as you’d become accepted by all because of your value.
Finally, remember to be kind to people. Don’t talk down on anyone. When you have contrary opinions, rightly coin your words to make your point with the utmost respect to the listener(s). You’ll be shocked to find out people will gravitate towards you in no time, and you’d be the ultimate show-runner as you’d want it.